Birthday resolutions

So my birthday was in late March. I’m a tad late for a birthday post, I know. Only two months behind. Whoops.*

I could have let it slide by and everything, but, you see, on my last birthday I was audacious enough to write a “9 before 29″ to do list and I feel I owe you (and myself) an update.

How did I do? Exceptionally poorly. I did manage to take a great holiday (#7) and do a (short) yoga retreat (#8) and I did work hard on my posture (#4) and not interrupting people (#10). I almost got to a french conversation meet-up (#1) but I made a scheduling error and missed it. The others I flat out didn’t do. So all in all, a little less than half of a very short list.

Thing is, I don’t care very much that I didn’t get through the list. The most interesting thing about this activity was seeing how much my priorities changed in a year. My list from last year was terribly ego-centric, now that I look back on it. Photoshopping and vlogging were not really creative interests – I wanted to do them to make my blog better, so you might like it more. And throwing “fabulous” parties? Come on.

I feel that my life is different now. I feel that I am different. I am more focused on a quieter life, but one that is joyful and fulfilling. I am more focused on me, but in a less ego-fuelled, more compassionate way. I feel that I am getting closer to my truth.

So this year, my list is different. I decided to make some resolutions again, but this time they are smaller and more achievable. The kind of things I can put in practice every single day. Little, daily goals and achievements to live my life by.

So here they are:

1) When given the choice between the lift and the stairs, always take the stairs.

2) Every day spend at least a little time outside and turn my face to the sun.

3) Choose foods that will nourish me.

michael pollan

4) Love like I mean it.

5) Make a daily gratitude list. Even if it’s only one thing.

(If there is one thing I’ve learnt from Brene Brown, it’s that gratitude is not an attitude – it is a practice. Joyful, grateful people train themselves to be so.)

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6) Move in a way that makes me feel good. Which usually, for me, means yes to yoga and no to the gym.

7) Dress to feel good. When I feel good I am more confident, which means I’m not all up in my own head comparing and worrying and I can be more present.

8) Write when the mood strikes. Too often, I feel the urge to write but I push it to one side because I “have” to do some other work first. Then when I try to return to the idea later, it’s lost its spark. Better to jot it down in the moment, even if that moment is slightly inconvenient. My writing is more authentic that way.

9) Conscious breathing!

10) No more feeling guilty over small things. So I forgot to make a reservation at restaurant A and we ended up eating at the slightly less good restaurant B. Who cares!! Go with the flow more and stop feeling responsible all the time.

 

That’s my list for the last year of my 20s. I have a feeling it will be a lot more enduring than the last one.

xoxo

Any resolutions you’d like to share?

 

* Travel and moving home again and the stupidly long time it takes to hook up the internet in this country are to blame for my long absence. Thank you all for your patience while I sorted my stuff out. I appreciate it more than you know xo


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6 Responses to Birthday resolutions

  1. Lozza says:

    Hey Love, I think your list is ambitious but very admirable! There are some annoying apps out there to help with daily gratitude (I can say this from first hand experience)… with the stairs/lifts biz I recommend avoiding high raise buildings ;)

    I’m amazed you ever worry or compare – you are always so elegant and beautiful, whatever you wear, and i can say this as your former flatmate who has seen you in pjs many times.

    I’m in a fairly zen place at the moment too. I’m working really hard on being the most authenthic version of myself. Sometimes I think I slip on masks without even realising, I’m trying really hard to not do this. The other thing that I’m working on is patience – since separating from Dave I’m being really focussed on being in the moment and not just filling up the spaces inbetween (especially not just for the sack of filling the space). I’m being patient with myself and the universe, trusting that everything is where it needs to be. It’s a good feeling not to be hiding behind things.

    I love reading your blog. I look forward to you writing more :) xoxox

    • Kylie says:

      Loz, you are such a sweetheart! I love you!

      I chose most of these goal precisely because they were NOT too ambitious, so it’s funny that you think they are so. I like them because most will only take a small moment in my day and all are really just about remaining conscious and connected to how I’m feeling, what I’m doing and what I’m eating. (Oh, and I’m definitely not talking about 50 storey buildings with the stair thing – I’m keeping that realistic!)

      I’m so happy for you with the journey you are on! I think we all slip on masks and, like you, I’m trying to do it less often and show up as ME as much as possible. I think one important thing is to surround yourself with people who support you and help you to be the best possible version of you. I love that you are concentrating on being in the moment and on patience, though I think you are already a pretty patient person! xox

  2. Juanita says:

    We all take our time to come to our “own”. I’m years ahead of you, in terms of age, but there’s still a long road ahead for me till I feel “me” enough and just accepting things, and the way I am.

    Your list looks achievable! Baby steps :)

  3. Hope Johnson says:

    You nailed it with this “The most interesting thing about this activity was seeing how much my priorities changed in a year”. That is so true. And the other thing I found interesting was the ones that you did achieve might be those that are more align with your values and priorities. Lozza also nailed it-you are elegant- which is an innate thing, so it’s good to know you can give yourself a pat on the back for that in and of itself.

    Just an idea for you re: gratitude but…
    At the end of everyday my friend Cathy and I send each other a facebook method with our WWW (what went well). We list 3 things that went well in the day. I think it is a gratitude exercise. Anyway, it is great to have someone else’s WWW because it keeps me accountable to doing them, and also because I can keep up with a lot of Cathy’s news even when we don’t get to see each other face-to-face for awhile. WWW can be really simple (about one sentence), like so far today, I dropped a blob of oatmeal on my desk, and I had this little bit of a tissue left over on my next and I could scrape the blob up with that- winning! So I’ll put this oatmeal fiasco + saviour on the list at the end of the day. I got the WWW from an interesting book called “Flourish” about positive psychology and public policy.

    • Kylie says:

      What a great system that you and Cathy have! I agree that sharing with someone really helps to keep you accountable and also create more joy in the process. Nic and I have been sharing three things with each other before we go to bed. That way, even if I’m too tired or lazy to write them out in my journal, I still go through the process of thinking about and articulating them.

      I read Flourish a little while ago – great book!

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